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Confessions
Felicity Huffman's What The Flicka - I'm So Vain

I’m So Vain, I Probably Think This Post Is About Me

Recently, I divulged to a friend that I had undergone a cosmetic procedure several years ago, a secret that I had only revealed to a small group of inner circle confidantes.

She shrugged, seemingly not fazed in the least by my confession. “Well, you’ve always been vain,” she commented casually.

Naturally, I was taken aback by her remark, not to mention a bit hurt. I did not think of myself as vain. Vain people, especially women, are villainous, self-obsessed and narcissistic – willing to stop at nothing to maintain their physical appearance, even if it means killing close family members that rival their own beauty. (See Snow White and possibly many other fairy tales…) Certainly I was no two dimensional cartoon character, but the exchange forced me to examine my own thoughts on what it meant to be proud versus conceited and where that line was drawn. READ MORE

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    My favorite word is f*ck. It can be used in many different situations and it’s so expressive. Since I had my daughter 3 years ago I have tried my best to watch what I say as far as cursing. Sometimes I do okay, other times not so much. I ...

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  • Confessions

    And That’s When I First Knew My Mother In Law Was Crazy

    Hindsight. It’s an amazing thing. Hindsight transports me back in time and allows me to travel through twenty years of marriage all over again. With hindsight (and an oversized box of wine), I’ve been able to zero in on the...Read More
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  • Confessions

    Confessions of A Late Bloomer

    I am a late bloomer.

    I always have been. Each year on my birthday I receive a phone call from my mother to remind me of how long it took to get me out of her uterus. “Oh, I remember where I was [fill in the birthday blank] years ago!” she clucks. “Enduring 10 hours of labor trying to give birth to you! God, I thought you’d never come out.” I thank her for the call and suggest she send an ecard next year. READ MORE

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  • Confessions
    Felicity Huffman's What The Flicka - Post-Adoption Bitterness

    Post-Adoption Bitterness

    How many times have you heard someone say admiringly “girlfriend is totally rocking that angry, bitter thing?” How ‘bout never? Lately, I’ve recognized bitterness in myself. It feels funny, like shoes that don’t fit but that I’m wearing anyway. I...Read More
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  • Sorry If I Embarrass You, Kid

    I’m writing with one eye closed. This usually only happens after I lose one contact lens, and I shut the gimp eye to see half-decently with the good eye. High rollers might bust out a brand-new lens, but I can’t. It throws off t...

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  • Confessions

    Watching Television With My Husband… Always An Adventure!

    If it weren’t for my husband’s need to hold a clicker and constantly bounce around channels we would have long ago cut the cable cord and watched television programming strictly through a service like Netflix or Hulu. As it is,...Read More
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    ConfessionsUncategorized
    Helen Mitternight

    What The Hell Happened To You?

    My bed is next to my closet and the doors of the closet are all mirrors. So, nearly every morning, I wake up and the first thing I see is my own reflection. And let me tell you, it’s a sobering way to start the day.

    Now, to be sure, there are some days that I see my reflection and my eyes are all full of sleep and haze and I think, “Damn. Look how cute I am!”

    But most days, I see my cheeks sagging pillow-ward, my breasts sliding precipitously into the mattress, and my stomach (when I’ve kicked off the covers) looking like dough that’s risen past the confines of the pan. And I think, “Damn! What the hell happened to you?” READ MORE

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  • Holiday Hump Day Cocktail: Celebratory Sangria!

    I’m all about good vibes on New Year’s Eve – I see it as starting the new year off right. So when I found this recipe for Celebratory Sangria, I knew this would be the one I’d make for my gathering this New Year’s ...

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  • Fall Pinterest Fail

    Damn you, Pinterest. Damn you. You’ve sucked me in and helped to create some craftiness in my life. Unfortunately, I have had many Pinterest fails. My latest one goes something like this: I re-pinned a Melted Crayon Pumpkins onto my K...

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