Sh*t My Six Year Old Says: Part 3

See previous installments (Part 1 and Part 2) of Shit Eden Says for more sass.

Eden graduated kindergarten this year and is moving on to bigger and better things. Like, wearing the above outfit as a flower girl in a wedding and driving me insane before 1st grade starts. One thing about her that always remains constant (other than her wicked sense of style, obvi) is her charming sense of humor. I hope you enjoy some of the shit Eden says. I do.

Callie: Eden, if you keep making that face it’ll get stuck that way.

Eden: Shut up, Callie. This is just my face.

Eden: Who farted?!

Me: Well, we’re the only two people in the car and it wasn’t me so….

Eden: …. okay. It was me.

Me: I had a feeling.

 

Eden: We had a substitute today. She was REALLY old but she didn’t die or anything.

Me: Is that woman crying? And is she barefoot walking down Figueroa? Yikes.

Eden: I feel so embarrassed for her because she’s crying in public with no shoes on.

Me: Pack a snack for the car ride.

Eden: I did. It’s bacon.

Callie: Eden called me a fat radish.

Eden: She deserved it.

“Oh this is my jam” – Eden when Miley’s ‘We Can’t Stop’ comes on in the car 

Eden: Eden (referring to herself in the 3rd person. Cool.) has a date with chocolate.

Me: if there were any doubt that you’re my child it’s gone now.

Eden: I freaking love donuts.

Ava: Who invented homework because I hate him.

Eden: George Washington.