An imperfect Mother behaving perfectly.
When my two girls were toddlers and I was losing my sanity, my soul, and my sense of personal hygiene, I felt like a lone voice in the wilderness calling for help. Everyone around me basked in questions like, “Oh My God, isn’t motherhood wonderful?” and
“Don’t you miss your baby when you’re at work?” and
“Isn’t this the best thing you have ever done?”
I thought more fitting questions would be, “Do you think you’re gonna survive this epidemic called Motherhood?”
“How do you deal with the guilt and relief when you are away from your kids?”
“Do you ever wonder if you made a big mistake?” and finally
“Are you ready to stab your husband in the eye?”
There was only one woman who answered my call for help with, “Oh my God, I know! They’re impossible! No, you’re not crazy, children are awful!” Her words were like finding a sand bar to stand on when you are drowning.
That woman was my Mother and I loved her for it. I’ll never forget her advice to me. I asked her how to be a GOOD MOTHER and she answered: “Spend less time with your children!”
Isn’t it interesting that so many Mother’s Day gifts involve time away from the kids? Spa days, massages, mani-pedis. I have a friend who, on Mother’s Day, gets the longest shower she wants and often won’t come out of the bathroom until noon at the earliest. Instinctively we all know self-care equals taking some time away from your children and THAT can be the best Mother’s Day present of all.
So this Mother’s Day I wanted to honor once again, Grace Huffman. She was a mother of eight, an imperfect mother herself, and she saved her daughter from being alone in the wilderness of mothering, which I think is a perfect thing to do. I love you and miss you Mom.
We at the WTF community officially stamp your hall pass for some serious me-time. Don’t waste a hall pass or a Mother ‘s Day.
Happy Imperfect Mother’s Day.